Two weeks ago I entered the “digital world” as my one friend puts it.
I finally have a smart phone.
and not just any smartphone but the new IPhone 6 Plus.
I didn’t just enter the digital world, but I smashed open the door and had sex with it on the dining room table. It’s been pretty nice too. I have really enjoyed my new smart phone.
But I noticed a week later that I struggled to get my phone’s camera to focus on far away images. Causing this terrible fuzzy/blurry look.
After returning home out West and a day of dealing with my customer service anxiety I went into Verizon. They barely look at the phone and tell me to make my way over to the Apple store at the local mall. Mind you, this mall has gotten a lot fancier over the years. Like when I was a kid it was just another mall, with a few select stores I wanted to visit. Now it has these wood floors, glass everywhere and the most high class Christmas decor. It’s a bit stressful for me in my cut up shirt, tight jeans, flip-flops, with messed up hair.
Still I make my way into the Apple Store. And after going through two employees, I make my way to the Genius table. Not super busy, so I get seen right away. Nice guy, but he seems to be high strung like me.
As he’s looking through my camera, he goes through pictures and various other things like and comes across a very well-focused image of a ball gag that was sent to me. He says,” oops, well you must be fun..” Then kind of nervously laughs and lets me know something is wrong with my camera on the phone and they will do a full replacement.
I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING! WHAT?! A BALL GAG!?
How did that picture get there??
Well, I was out of town last week like I said. Visiting friends and celebrating my little brother’s graduation. Long story short (Post to come later) I met up with a wonderful man (who had no clue I was attracted to him) I thought I was rather clear, but my clear is well….
But anyways I told him and we made out, it was great and umm how do I put this. This picture was sent to me by him. Kind of like a promo for a movie or like when Verizon puts out a promo like “Buy this phone and you could get this other phone for free.” So it was like, “Come spend time with me and you could see this.”
That’s the short version of how that picture got on my phone.
And how the guy named Chuck at the Apple Store saw this said picture.
Thank goodness I don’t embarrass easy and I thought this would be the end of the picture mishap. OOOOOHH I was so wrong.
SO I go into Apple today to trade in phone that’s not working well, with a brand new one. My mom comes with me because I say, yeah let’s hang out Mom! This guy who is helping set up my new phone (who my mother has deemed cute) he comes across the photo and is like oh and my mom sees it and says, “I thought Jennifer Lawerance nude photos would have taught you.” I want to facepalm, but I just laugh and the guy laughs. THEN MY MOTHER SAYS, “Whoever sent you that, well you should date him. He must be fun.” I say, “let us never speak of this again.”
Mind you that the Apple store must have been really into the Awesome Mix from The Guardians of the Galaxy because this song was playing over and over on the speakers during the whole situation.
And I now have my new iPhone Plus, the Camera works and I can’t delete that damn photos. My damn iCloud won’t let me.
So here’s to probably more weird picture encounters at phone stores
And my mother trying to get me out of the house.